Thursday, August 8, 2013

Say No to Mommy Guilt

By: Amanda Drogmiller

Mommy guilt. We all have it in one form or another. My mommy guilt came in the form of training for a race or a Triathlon. I struggled every day I would leave my kiddos (all three of them) to go run or swim or whatever I felt the need to do that day. But, when I would get in training mode all thoughts except what I needed to do to successfully train went out the window. Does that make me a bad mom? Absolutely not. Quite the opposite I believe.

I get asked the question all the time “How do you find time to train?” My answer:  ME time becomes a priority.  Balance doesn’t come easy and it is tough to balance training with parenthood but it is so worth it! I find that when I come back from training that I am happier, more patient, and frankly more sane.

So, how do you do it?

For me, it’s just a few simple steps:

Let  go of the guilt. Rather than dwell on the fact that I am not with my kiddos or my hubby I think about how much better of a mommy I will be when I return. I think about the fact that my kids will see me being active and they will want to follow suit. I think about the fact that my mental health in general makes me calmer, more patient and a better wife to my hubby!  I can do all of that because I have a great support system.  So whether it’s your significant other, your mom, or dad, or even your neighbor find someone you trust to keep your kiddos while you are out training.  

Be organized.  I find that most days of the week I have at least 3 activities on the calendar. If I don’t schedule time for myself the day is long gone and I am left thinking “Man.. how did I miss the whole day?!”  So, I schedule my training on our family calendar. As I am sure most of you have, we have handy dandy IPhones that updates anytime we add something to the calendar. When I schedule a run or ride, I add it to our calendar and it sends a reminder to my hubby. There is no guess work or stress of how to fit in time when it’s already scheduled. Think of that time as just as important as a doctor’s appointment or a meeting at work so that you won’t let yourself cancel.

Involve your family in the event you’re training for. I find that when my family comes to events that I am training for it makes it that much more special. My family gets to see why I went for crazy long runs or why I biked 30 miles ;) My kids see the excitement and see the hard work I have put in and they learn to value hard work as well and for me there is no describing the feeling I get when my kiddos are cheering me on at the finish!

So, my friends… take time for yourself. Go run, walk, swim, ride… whatever makes you happy and you will find yourself a better mommy in the process.

1 comment:

  1. Happy mommies are good mommies. Just because someone becomes a parent doesn't mean that he or she needs to lose their identity and lose themselves in that caretaker role. I think that training for something (or really taking on any outside activity) models healthy living, commitment and ambition to children, which is invaluable in terms of life lessons.